Chapter 1I was dying. Told my son to bury me next to his dad. But then he said his dad's not dead.
I didn't get it. Tried to sit up.
He pulled out a photo. Shoved it in my face.
"Dad's been with Miss Willow for twenty years. I was supposed to pick up my little sister from her SATs today, but YOU had to die TODAY."
I stared at that photo. My chest tightened. Couldn't breathe.
Then he sighed. Dropped the real bomb.
"Oh, and you didn't fail the SATs. Dad gave your acceptance letter to Miss Willow. She went to college on YOUR spot."
"Plus I was never kidnapped. Dad and Miss Willow took me. You just wouldn't stop looking..."
Everything went black.
I looked for him for YEARS. Got hit by a truck. Lost my legs. My face. My eye. Became a cripple.
And he just told me it was all a lie.
I died hating them.
When I opened my eyes again, I was back—the day my acceptance letter came.
This time? Screw all of them.
They can rot. I'm taking MY life back.
---
"Nadia, look, it's fine. You didn't make it this time—so what? Try again next year. No big deal."
I woke up. Heart was pounding.
Sebastian had his hand on my head, but he was looking at Willow. Only at her.
"Willow, congrats. You're the first person here to get into college. That's amazing."
Willow grabbed his arm. Her voice went all soft.
"I couldn't do it without you guys. You and Nadia helped me so much."
She looked at me. Smiled real sweet. But her eyes? Different story.
"Nadia, he's right. You worked hard. You'll get in next year."
I just stared at them.
Sebastian noticed. He coughed. Looked down.
"Nadia... you okay?"
"Mom's so stupid! She didn't even get into college. So embarrassing!"
Five-year-old Benny ran in and grabbed onto Willow's leg.
"Miss Willow's way smarter! She's going to college! I want her to be my mom!"
Willow laughed and patted his head.
"Aw, Benny. I love you too."
She pulled out a Hershey's Kiss, unwrapped it, and stuck it in his mouth.
"Tastes good, right? When I get rich, I'll buy you chocolate all the time."
Benny was chewing, big smile on his face. "Yeah! Miss Willow's the best!"
I stared at that wrapper. My chest got tight.
Meat was expensive. Chocolate was even worse. I'd been saving for three months just to buy some for Benny's birthday.
Now the tin in my drawer was open. Empty.
"Willow. Where'd you get that chocolate?"
My voice was cold.
Willow stopped. Moved behind Sebastian real quick.
"Nadia... what's wrong? It's just candy..."
"Where'd you get it?"
Sebastian pulled her behind him. He was frowning now.
"It's just candy, Nadia. Willow didn't mean anything. The kid wanted some—"
"That was MY money. I saved three months for Benny's birthday."
"You took it without asking. That's stealing."
"I didn't! Sebastian bought it for me..." Willow's eyes got all watery. She bit her lip.
Sebastian looked away.
"I bought it for Willow, okay? It's not a big deal. She felt bad for the kid."
"Mom's so cheap! She's mean!" Benny stuck his tongue out at me. Hiding behind Willow's legs.
"I don't want your dumb candy! I only want Miss Willow's! You're not my real mom. Your stuff is gross."
I looked at him. This kid. The one I almost died having.
My heart just... stopped.
I turned around. Walked into the bedroom. Slammed the door.
Outside, I could hear Willow. Her voice all soft and sad.
"Sebastian... is Nadia mad at me? Maybe I shouldn't go to college..."
"Don't worry. She's always like this. She'll get over it."
That night, Sebastian came in with an apple. Trying to make things better.
"Nadia, look... Willow's had a hard life. No parents. She grew up with nothing. She doesn't think sometimes. Don't be mad at her."
He tried to touch me, but then—
"Sebastian... my stomach hurts so bad..."
Willow's voice. Sounded weak. Like she was in pain.
Sebastian just ran out.
Didn't come back that night.
Chapter 2
Next morning, Willow saw me. Made that sad face right away.
"Nadia, it's not what you think. I had cramps last night. Sebastian was worried. That's why he stayed."
She tried to grab my hand.
"And about college—don't feel bad. When I do good, I'll help you guys out."
When Sebastian first told me about his friend—the girl with no parents—I felt bad.
So I treated her like family. Gave her stuff. Went without.
Her aunt and uncle tried to sell her. I didn't think twice. Gave them all my savings. Got her out.
All that. For nothing.
Turns out I raised a snake.
I moved back. Didn't let her grab me. Didn't even look at her.
"Oh yeah? Thanks, I guess."
Willow looked over at Sebastian's door. Sighed. Like I hurt her.
"Look, Nadia. I know you're upset. But that's just how it is."
"Sebastian says I'm smarter, and—"
Everything she said. Sebastian this. Sebastian that. Every word hurt.
She made a sound. Smacked her mouth.
"Oh my god, I'm sorry! I didn't mean that. Don't be mad..."
Sebastian came out right then. Saw us. His face got dark.
"Nadia, can you stop? Willow told you already. Why are you doing this?"
"Sebastian, don't. It's my fault..." Willow leaned on him. Eyes getting wet.
Sebastian put his hand on her shoulder. Looked at me like I was the problem.
"Nadia, why do you make everything a big deal?"
I saw his neck. That hickey there.
"Yeah? And you're real nice, huh?"
I pointed at it.
He pulled his shirt up. Gonna say something.
I cut him off. "I'm going to town."
"We'll all go. Willow got into college. Big deal. We should celebrate."
At Walmart, Sebastian pointed at a shirt. Flowers. Expensive.
Then he looked at me. Hand out.
"Nadia, gimme your cash."
I didn't move.
He came close. Like he's hugging me. But his hand went in my pocket.
"Gonna get Willow something. I'll pay you back. She starts college soon—can't look bad."
Willow came out. New shirt. Spinning at the mirror. Smiling big.
Sebastian just stared at her. Looked soft.
After shopping, he checked his watch.
"Nadia, you look tired. Go wait at the bus station."
"Me and Willow are gonna get some books. For college."
I followed them quietly.
They didn't go get books.
They went to take pictures. Wedding pictures.
I watched Sebastian smile at her. Like she's everything.
Nails digging in. My hands hurt. Drew blood.
Sebastian Hawthorne. You think you can take my future? Give it to her?
Not happening.
Chapter 3
When we got back from town, Sebastian said at dinner:
"Three days. I'm having a party. Inviting the whole village!"
I stopped drinking. "A party? With what money?"
He got stiff. "Took that fifty bucks. Under the mattress."
"That's Benny's school money. And groceries." I stood up.
He waved his hand. "Relax. I get paid this month. I'll cover it."
His paycheck?
Ten years married. Every cent went to Willow.
Every time I said something? Same thing: She's got no parents. Her aunt and uncle are bad. Just help her out.
"Oh, and that pig outside? Get someone to kill it tomorrow. For the party."
That pig. I was gonna sell it. Buy winter clothes for him and Benny.
Now he wants to kill it. For her.
"What about your paycheck? Doesn't Willow need it for school?"
He flinched. Looked away.
"You old lady! You're so mean! You won't let Miss Willow have a party!"
Benny threw his bowl. Ran to Willow. Hugged her. Face all red.
Willow held him. Voice shaking. Eyes getting wet.
"Sebastian... don't fight about me. If Nadia doesn't want it, forget it. I won't go to college."
"No way!" Sebastian freaked out. Wiped her tears with his thumb. Like she's gonna break.
"Don't worry. I got this."
Next day, Sebastian still killed the pig.
People started talking.
"You hear? Sebastian's wife didn't get in. But that girl living with them did."
"I'm telling you, he treats Willow better than his wife. New clothes, killed the pig... Something's going on."
"Probably. Guy and girl in the same house? Who knows."
By evening, everyone knew.
Willow ran to the river. Screaming she's gonna drown herself.
"I can't do this! I didn't do anything! Everyone's saying things about me! I should just die!"
Sebastian and Benny grabbed her. Pulled her back. Both crying.
Willow fell into Sebastian's arms. Crying hard.
"Sebastian... Nadia hates me. I knew. Because I got into college. So she's telling lies..."
"I should die. Give her my spot. Then maybe she'll stop."
Sebastian turned around. Stared at me. Eyes all red.
"Nadia! You bitch! I knew it was you!"
"I didn't."
"Who else?! You're jealous!"
Benny grabbed some mud. Threw it at me.
"Bad lady! I hope you die! I don't want you!"
"You hit me! You yell at me! You don't feed me! You're a witch!"
Five years old. Already hated me.
I looked at his face. All twisted up. And suddenly I was back there—back to my last life.
The day Sebastian and Willow died in a car crash. On the way to her college.
I left Benny with the neighbor. Went to see the bodies.
Came back with their ashes. Found out Benny was gone. Kidnapped.
Husband dead. Son missing.
I wanted to die. Stood by the river so many times. Ready to jump.
But I'd think about Benny. Out there somewhere. Needing me.
So I didn't.
Sold my blood. Did construction. Dug through trash. Looked for him everywhere.
Then a truck hit me. Broke my legs. Messed up my face.
I became some crippled freak. Lived off collecting cans.
But I still kept looking.
Twenty years later, I finally found him. Before I was dying.
He didn't come see me.
He came to say he'd been living good with Sebastian and Willow. This whole time.
Said I was a pain. Dying on his sister's SAT day.
I looked at him. Screaming at me. Swearing at me.
Nothing. I felt nothing.
"Fine. You think I did it? I did it."
