Chapter 1They both got married that day—my boyfriend to the daughter, Dad to the mom—and I walked into the lake holding Mom's ashes.
Water hit my neck. Eighteen-year-old him called.
"Andi, you the happiest bride today?"
Today was supposed to be our wedding. We promised each other when we were kids.
I laughed. Tears streaming down.
"Yeah. Wedding's perfect. That pink diamond you promised? The dress you'd design? All there."
"Bride just wasn't me. It was Sienna."
I sank with Mom. Everything went black.
Woke up in a hospital room.
Rowan stood there. Still in his tux. Looked like he was done with me.
"Faking suicide at Sienna's wedding? That's fucked up."
"You want a wedding? Fine. Wait till Sienna has the baby. I'll throw you one."
He left. Room went dead silent.
My hand shook. I grabbed the knife by the bed.
Phone rang again. Young Rowan.
"Andi, tell me that wasn't me. The guy who married her—tell me that wasn't me."
"...It's you."
---
Even teenage Rowan couldn't figure out how he stopped loving me. How was I supposed to get over it?
I was gonna hang up. Door flew open. Rowan grabbed the knife.
Checked my wrist. Looked over my skin.
No cuts. He let out a breath.
"Shit, Andi. Just found out you were pregnant."
"Didn't make it."
"Don't pull this shit again. We can have another kid."
I stared at my stomach. Eyes burning. Couldn't cry.
My baby? Gone. Sienna's baby? Fine.
My baby never got any love from Rowan. Sienna's got everything.
Why?
Rowan went crazy in that hospital room. Took everything sharp.
Knife, scissors, glass—all gone. Put those baby bumpers everywhere.
Then grabbed my hand. Looked tired as hell but tried to be nice.
"Andi, stop. You wanted to marry me, right? Just... be good. After Sienna has the baby, I'll throw you a wedding. Same as hers."
I turned around. Didn't look at him.
A wedding?
Don't want it.
Not after Rowan brought pregnant Sienna to Mom. Mom got so stressed she went into a coma.
Not after Mom died and I did everything myself while Rowan and Dad were busy with their mistresses' weddings.
Not after my baby died in that freezing lake.
Twelve years with Rowan?
I'm done.
"Get out."
That nice guy act? Didn't work. He lost it. Punched the wall.
"Andi, I'm talking to you! Look at me!"
Blood running down his hand.
Sienna came running in. Grabbed onto Rowan. Still wearing that wedding dress.
Tore off some fabric, wrapped up his hand.
I stared at that dress.
The one I designed at sixteen. With Rowan. Together.
He kissed my forehead back then. Said in ten years I'd be wearing it at our wedding.
Damn thing turned out beautiful.
All these years, every time Rowan went somewhere, he'd buy expensive diamonds. Didn't care what they cost.
Said he'd put them all over the dress.
He did it. Made the most beautiful dress ever.
Then put it on someone else.
Sienna saw me staring. Could tell I was jealous. She got all smug about it.
"Andi, messing with Rowan again when I'm not around?"
"Crazy runs in the family, right? Your mom made Uncle Brennan's life hell. You gonna do that to Rowan too? Suck him dry?"
"Leave him alone."
That huge pink diamond on her finger. Blinding me.
I yanked the IV out. Threw it at her. Eyes burning.
"Don't talk about my mom!"
Rowan jumped in front of her. IV bag hit his back. Saline got in my eyes. Stung like hell.
"Sienna, I told you not to come. What if she freaks out and hurts you?"
Rowan held up her dress like she's a damn princess. Walked her out.
I felt around under my pillow. Found the pills.
Phone rang. That voice. Far away but I knew it.
The kid. Crying.
"If that's gonna be me someday, I'd rather just die now. Can't watch him treat you like this."
"Andi, if I die... does he go away?"
Chapter 2
That kid's voice—it was real. Haven't heard that in years.
I froze. Hand just opened. Pills everywhere.
Twenty-eight-year-old Rowan thinks I'm crazy. Thinks I'm ruining his life.
Eighteen-year-old Rowan? I'm his whole world. Only thing he cares about.
Dad cheated on Mom with Sienna's mom back in elementary school.
Kids called me "the girl with no dad."
Sienna made sure I got all the shit jobs. Taking out trash. Cleaning bathrooms. Everything.
I did it. They still called me dirty.
Sat alone for two years. Then Rowan came to our school. Sat next to me.
After that? He did all that stuff instead.
Helped me with homework. Got my water. Walked me home when nobody else would.
When Sienna got everyone making fun of me, he grabbed her. Had his hand around her neck.
"Your mom's a homewrecker. Know your place."
"Touch Andi again, you won't be able to talk."
After that, nobody messed with me.
I asked him why he was nice to me but pushed everyone else away.
He touched my face. Eyes were red.
"Andi, nobody wanted me either."
"Before I came here, I got treated like shit. Same as you. But when I saw you, I knew I had to get stronger. So I could protect you."
"Andi. Let me protect you. Always."
Rowan lit up my world.
We said we'd go to the same college. Actually be together.
Senior year, it all went to shit.
Sienna got me to go to the equipment room. These guys jumped me. Ripped my shirt off. Had cameras on me.
Rowan showed up. His eyes looked insane. He beat the crap out of them.
That little knife he'd use to cut my apples?
Went into Sienna.
Blood all over his hands, but he threw his jacket over me. Wouldn't stop shaking.
"Andi, you're okay."
"I got you. Nobody's touching you."
Rowan was getting into college. All that got fucked. Juvie instead. No school.
He got out when I was a sophomore.
Dad gave me nothing. Too busy with Sienna's family.
Rowan did construction. Moved cement until he was just bruises.
Skinny ass kid paid my tuition. Mom's hospital.
After I graduated, I said no to grad school. Started a business with Rowan.
We were crazy about each other. Thought everything would work out.
Then the year before IPO, Sienna got hired as Rowan's assistant.
At first he treated her like shit. Said he was getting back at her.
But on my twenty-fifth birthday, Rowan never came home.
I was losing it when Sienna sent me a picture. Her and Rowan. In bed.
"Happy birthday, Andi. Like your present?"
Came back to reality. Lying in bed. Holding my phone like it was all I had left.
"Rowan... Rowan..."
"I'm here."
The kid kept answering. His voice was calm.
"Andi, I'm here. You're okay."
"Pull yourself together. I need you to see what happens to the people who mess with you."
I wiped my face. Nodded.
Yeah. As long as that eighteen-year-old version of Rowan was there, I didn't have to be scared.
Chapter 3
Morning came. I woke up. Rowan was there holding a dress.
I laughed. Sounded bitter.
"Rowan, I'm not marrying you. You're already married."
He didn't look at me.
"Andi, it's not for a wedding. It's a bridesmaid dress."
"You messed up Sienna's wedding with that suicide thing. She's over it. Wants another one. You're her bridesmaid."
I stared at him. Couldn't believe it.
"No fucking way."
I grabbed the dress. Threw it down.
Rowan just watched.
"Dr. Wells, two more shots."
I fought until I was too tired. Rowan sat down. Moved my hair back.
"Andi, Sienna's been with me forever. We kept it quiet. Now everyone thinks she stole you from me. I need you to tell them that's not true. Just... stop the rumors."
I pushed his hand away.
"Dream on! She and her mom are homewreckers. Always were. Always will be."
Whatever was soft in his eyes? Gone. He gave me this look.
"Homewrecker? Sienna's my wife."
I bit my tongue. Hard. Tasted blood.
Yeah. Sienna had the wedding. The license. The baby.
Me? Nothing.
I was the homewrecker.
I just gave up. Let the nurses stick me with sedatives.
Rowan put his hand over my eyes. Didn't want me to see the needle.
When he saw how empty my eyes were, something in him broke. He kissed my forehead.
"Andi, I still love you."
"I promise. Everything Sienna gets, you get. Wedding, ring, baby. All of it."
"She just gets it first."
The drugs hit. Everything got fuzzy.
I nodded.
Figured if I said yes, maybe they'd stop hurting me.
Those needles hurt like a bitch.
When he saw I wasn't fighting anymore, Rowan looked happy.
Ordered jasmine flowers. My favorite. Put them all over the room.
Took me to get Thai food. This place we used to go to in high school.
Before he left, he told me to be good at the wedding.
Room quiet again.
I sat on the bed. Eighteen-year-old Rowan called.
Heard his voice. Everything just fell apart.
"He wants me at his wedding. Sienna's wedding."
"Rowan, why do you hate me?"
"If I died there... would he finally leave me alone?"
"Andi!"
The kid's voice cracked. He was begging.
"Just wait a little bit, okay? I found a way to get to you."
"Just give me some time. I swear I'll get there."
"...Okay."
My voice broke.
"Hurry."
Rowan and Sienna's wedding went perfect.
"Andi, Sienna's dress got messed up."
Rowan looked at me.
I got on my knees. Fixed it. Felt dead inside.
Wedding was huge.
Rowan invited everyone. Wanted everyone to know he married the woman he loved.
Old classmates showed up. Saw Rowan marrying Sienna—two people who hated each other before. They whispered:
"Rowan was obsessed with Andi. What happened?"
"Sienna's mom was a mistress. Apple doesn't fall far."
Rowan touched Sienna's face. Waved me over.
"Andi, remember what to say? Go up there."
"Tell them you were like a sister to me. I always loved Sienna. We were never together. She's my girl."
"Then say congrats."
He looked away. Knew this was messed up. Voice got quiet.
"Just for show. Once Sienna has the baby, I'll give you anything."
"Help me this once."
I took the mic. Walked up front.
"Hey everyone. I gotta say something real quick."
"A lot of you think Sienna stole Rowan from me. That she's a homewrecker. Well—"
I looked at Sienna. Smiled.
"You're right. She is. Her mom wrecked my parents' marriage. She wrecked mine. That's what they are."
