Chapter 1After Grandma died, Mom and Dad dragged me back to Manhattan.
That's when I found out I had a sister—just ONE year younger.
"You're the oldest, Mira. Act like it."
I nodded. Got it—in this family, I ranked fourth.
Then Asher was born.
I dropped to FIFTH.
Sophomore summer, I came home from MIT—only to find they'd changed the smart locks.
NO ONE told me.
Dead phone, I waited outside. EIGHT. HOURS.
They FINALLY showed up, laughing about their trip.
All four wore matching family tees—I didn't get one.
Dad tried to add my fingerprint, annoyed.
"Only five admin slots. It's full."
Mom waved it off. "Just throw her on guest access."
WAIT.
Five people. Five slots. How's it full?
Asher saw my confusion. Smirked.
"Hailey gave the last spot to Buddy. He's family too, duh."
So the DOG got admin access—I got "guest mode."
Five-person family.
Dog: fifth.
Me: SIXTH.
That night, I signed the application for Vandenberg's classified project.
Keep your fucking guest mode.
...
"Mira, how long are you staying this time?"
Dad didn't look up, busy setting up the lock on his phone.
"Guest accounts max out at a week. I'll give you seven days."
"Ask me to renew when it expires."
Mom grabbed my hand and pressed it to the sensor.
Three fingers. Right hand. All failed.
She was getting annoyed. "Why are you such a pain?"
"Hailey and Asher got in on the first try."
Mom told me to try my left thumb.
Failed again.
She let go.
"Always making extra work. Figure it out yourself."
I stared at my palm.
Before I turned ten, I lived with Grandma upstate. She was sick a lot.
I did the work—school, then chores, cutting grass, feeding cows.
After she died, they brought me back.
As the "older sister," I did housework. Dishes, tables, floors. Hands soaked in cleaning solution constantly.
Maybe my fingerprints wore down.
Maybe the calluses made them unreadable.
"Stop spacing out."
Dad's voice cut through.
"If this doesn't work, we won't unlock the door for you every time."
"Don't go saying we locked you out again."
I pulled out a tissue, wiped the sweat off my palm, and pressed down hard.
Beep.
"Guest access registered."
Dad pocketed his phone. Walked to the living room.
They were sorting through souvenirs from their trip.
Coffee for Dad's clients.
Snacks for Mom's coworkers.
Decorations for the relatives.
Half a suitcase full of gifts.
Not a single one for me.
My voice came out flat. "Where did you guys go?"
Why didn't I know?
No one answered.
Hailey scrolled through photos, giggling into Mom's shoulder.
"Mom, look at this family photo. So cute."
Dad leaned over. "Looks great."
"Hailey, those poses you came up with were really creative."
Family photo. Without me.
Asher wrinkled his nose, waved his hand, then turned to me.
"Oh yeah, sis—you should shower. You kinda smell. Can't you tell?"
"How are you grosser than me, and I'm a dude?"
Mom didn't miss a beat.
"Seriously. Go wash up."
"Don't bring your grandma's habits into this house."
Mid-July. I'd stood in a hallway with no AC for eight hours.
Drenched in sweat. Hair stuck to my face and neck.
But I didn't dare leave. Scared I'd miss them.
They didn't ask if I was hot. Didn't ask if I was hungry.
Just said I smelled bad.
I turned and headed toward the bathroom.
My phone buzzed in my pocket.
A message from Professor Hayes.
[This project is classified. Once you're in, no outside contact. Does your family know?]
I typed back: [Thanks, Professor. I'll talk to them.]
But I wouldn't.
A guest doesn't need permission to leave.
Chapter 2
I walked into my bedroom to grab clothes.
The moment I switched on the light, I froze.
Storage boxes. Everywhere.
My trophies were gone from the shelf.
Replaced by Asher's airplane models.
I opened the closet.
It was packed with Hailey's off-season clothes.
I turned and went back to the living room.
"Where's my stuff?"
"Threw it out. You weren't using it."
Mom didn't even look up.
"Your brother and sister have too much stuff. Their rooms are full."
"So I had them put the overflow in yours."
"You're barely here anyway. Room was just sitting empty."
"Where am I supposed to sleep?"
Dad never looked up from his phone. "Move the boxes to the storage room. Do I have to spell everything out?"
I went to the storage room. Half empty.
By the time I finished hauling boxes, I was drenched in sweat again.
I sat down for a moment to rest.
Dad frowned.
"Why aren't you showering yet?"
"Someone's in the bathroom."
"Hailey and Asher know how to manage their time. You? Always dragging your feet and waiting for everyone else to finish."
I was too tired to argue. Chugged some water.
Another hour passed before it was finally my turn.
The bathroom was still steamy.
The heat made my head spin.
Mom knocked on the door and yelled through it.
"Wash properly. Don't be as dirty as you were when you were little."
The water hit my face like heavy rain.
I wiped my eyes. Couldn't tell if it was water or tears.
When I first came back, I always had to wait for Hailey to finish.
Back then, we had an electric water heater.
By the time it was my turn, the hot water was gone.
I'd rinse off with cold water and call it done.
Then one day at a family dinner, my aunt grabbed my ear. Laughed.
"God! Look how dirty behind her ears."
"Don't you know how to scrub?"
Mom slammed her fork on the table.
"She learned that from her grandma. Terrible hygiene."
But Grandma never taught me.
She was old. Her eyes were bad. She couldn't spare the energy to look after me properly.
Mom didn't either.
She was busy bathing Hailey. No time for me.
That night, Mom dragged me to the bathroom and turned the water on hot.
I tried to dodge.
"Mom, it's too hot—"
She got angrier. Grabbed a scrub towel. Went at me hard.
"Do you know how embarrassing you are?"
"You're filthy. Nothing like me."
After that, every time I showered, I scrubbed myself raw. Head to toe. Until my skin turned red.
She never noticed.
When I stepped out, Dad lowered his voice.
"Your brother and sister are asleep."
"Don't use the hairdryer. It's too loud."
I nodded.
Towel-dried my hair. Over and over.
Then I opened my laptop to finish the application.
Water dripped from my hair onto my hand. Cold.
The instructions said tonight was the final deadline.
Departure: two weeks from now.
I scrolled to the confidentiality clause.
No outside contact during the project. Including family.
I didn't hesitate.
Clicked submit.
---
Next morning, I printed the consent form the school required. Needed my parents' signatures.
Dad was watching the morning news.
"Go ask your mom. Can't you see I'm busy?"
Mom was checking Asher's summer homework.
I handed her the form. She scribbled her name without looking.
"Don't you want to read it?"
"No need."
She waved me off. "It's not like anything you do is important."
Hailey was texting her friends. Asher was still asleep.
No one knew I was about to disappear.
And no one cared.
Chapter 3
A few days later, guests came over.
Some of Dad's friends.
I was in the kitchen washing fruit. Heard Dad introducing Hailey and Asher.
One of them laughed.
"Daniel, you're a lucky man."
"Your daughter's at SUNY, and your son's already winning math competitions at his age."
"You've raised them well."
Dad played it down. "Not really. My oldest doesn't listen."
"I told her to pick a college closer to home. She went all the way to Boston."
"And she's studying... what is it..."
"Something about building airplanes. Doesn't sound practical."
Aerospace Propulsion Engineering.
Professor Hayes said our program focuses on rocket engines and propulsion systems.
We're building the "heart" of rockets.
But to Dad, it was that impractical major he couldn't even remember.
---
At the table, one of the aunts turned to me.
"My daughter got into a Boston school this year too."
"Big city. I don't know how much to give her."
"I—"
Before I could answer, Mom dropped a shrimp in my bowl.
"You have to spoil girls a little."
"Hailey gets $2,500 a month in Albany, and I still send her extra cash here and there."
"Can't have her getting tricked by some guy offering her small favors."
"I'd be heartbroken."
Hailey pouted.
"Mo-om—"
"You still won't buy me a new tablet, and I got a scholarship this semester."
Mom pulled her close.
"Fine. We'll get you one in a few days."
I stayed quiet.
Instead, I looked down at my phone.
Battery almost dead.
It was Dad's old one.
He'd used it for five years before handing it down.
I'd been using it for two years since high school.
Now it lagged constantly. Battery barely held a charge.
My monthly allowance? $500.
Because they were putting two daughters through college. And paying for Asher's tutoring.
As the "older sister," I was supposed to understand.
The aunt sighed.
"Hailey got a scholarship? That's amazing."
Hailey's lips curved.
"It's just a departmental one. Nothing major. I can do better."
Mom beamed with pride.
"She's too modest. It's still $800. My oldest never got one."
Asher piped up.
"Then I'm gonna get scholarships too. Like Hailey."
Dad ruffled his hair.
Everyone at the table laughed.
Only I stayed quiet.
Picked the shrimp out of my bowl.
I'm allergic to shellfish.
It makes me break out in hives. I can't sleep from the itching.
After all these years, Mom still didn't remember.
As for the national scholarship certificate in my suitcase—no point bringing it up.
Just like how I ranked top ten in the state for my SATs, and they didn't throw me a celebration dinner.
"Your sister's taking the SATs next year."
"If we do something for you now, she'll feel pressured."
"We'll celebrate both of you together once she gets into college."
The next year, Hailey got into a state school.
They booked twenty tables at a hotel.
I asked if they could save one table for my teachers. To thank them.
Instead, they scolded me.
"Do you have to steal your sister's spotlight?"
I'd learned that lesson a long time ago.
When Hailey was the star, I was supposed to fade into the background.
Eventually, the guests left.
I washed dishes. Mopped the floor.
When I finally had a chance to ask Dad—half-lying on the couch, sobering up—to renew my guest access, he grunted.
Hailey and Asher were playing games nearby. Loud.
Thinking he hadn't heard me, I repeated myself.
Dad frowned impatiently and pulled out his phone.
"Fine. Another week. That enough?"
"Why are you staying so long this time? Aren't you working a summer job?"
Before I could answer, he muttered.
"You're old enough to help out around here."
"But you just sit at home all day."
I pressed my lips together. Watched him close his eyes again.
Turned.
Walked away.
---
Next morning, I was about to brush my teeth.
Dad rubbed his head and called out to me.
"I drank too much last night. Said some things I shouldn't have."
"Didn't mean to kick you out."
I nodded. "I know."
I knew he meant every word when he was drunk.
I knew I should be out working part-time like I did every other break.
I knew there was no room for me in this home anymore.
