Chapter 1For thirty years of marriage, the most common phrase Lucian and I said to each other was "go to hell."
I hated that his heart belonged only to his first love; he hated me for tearing them apart.
Right before my death, we had just had a massive fight.
Before slamming the door on his way out, he added something to my water.
The moment the poison took effect, I knew exactly who the culprit was.
I managed to hold on until he returned home, then plunged a knife into his abdomen, sending him to hell with me.
But in my final moments, I heard him stop his subordinates who wanted to kill me, using his last breath to instruct:
"Give her the antidote... I found..."
"After I'm gone... continue investigating... who's been poisoning her all this time..."
"And... when she wakes up... don't tell this crazy woman... that I was the one who found the antidote..."
I lay there with my eyes closed as a tear rolled down my cheek.
Only in our final moments did I realize how terribly wrong we both had been.
After being reborn, I immediately decided to study abroad in France.
From now on, I would never interfere with his love life again.
...
When I opened my eyes, I was leaning against a warm embrace.
I turned sharply, meeting Lucian's bloodshot eyes.
For a moment, we both froze.
This was the day after I had stood in the pouring rain all night to force him to marry me.
Lucian clearly hadn't slept at all, with stubble covering his jaw.
Seeing me awake, the worry in his eyes vanished, replaced by the familiar tension I knew from my previous life after he pushed me away.
"Lucian..." I called out, my voice hoarse.
"What?" he responded coldly.
"Hold me a little longer..."
He got up to leave.
But the next second, I embraced him from behind.
I could feel his muscles tense beneath my palms.
"Rachel..."
He gripped my hands tightly.
"I don't love you."
"I know."
I pressed myself against his back, savoring his warmth one last time.
"I understand now."
"You understand now..."
His scoff was full of exhaustion.
"You always say that."
He forcefully pried my hands away, pushed me onto the bed, and left without looking back.
That retreating figure slamming the door resembled the last time I saw him in my previous life.
I looked down at my palms.
They still held his warmth.
But he didn't know.
This time, I truly understood.
I was his childhood sister, the daughter of his late benefactor, the annoying little sister who always gave him headaches.
But never his wife...
I closed my eyes briefly.
I understood now.
I would let go.
My phone vibrated with a call from my assistant:
"Miss Kingsley, we've done the research. Didn't you always want to have your wedding in Turkey? Would you like to change the venue to Turkey?"
"Ask Lilith Morgan if she'd like that. She loves Turkey too. If she agrees, make the change."
"Why?"
My assistant seemed confused: "But you're the bride, aren't you?"
"Not anymore, starting today."
After hanging up, I called my PhD advisor.
"You've made up your mind? No wedding? Ready to join me on the international project?"
My advisor confirmed repeatedly.
I nodded firmly: "I've decided. No going back."
My advisor sighed with relief, quickly signing the documents before I could change my mind:
"Even though you're about to graduate, they've always wanted to keep you on the team. Many people applied for this project, but no one could replace you.
"I'm glad you've figured things out. Marriage can wait three years—what's the rush anyway?"
I felt a pang of guilt.
Originally, they had specifically requested me for this project.
But I'd been so fixated on Lucian that I kept refusing my advisor's invitation.
My advisor had no choice but to look for someone else.
In the end, they couldn't find anyone suitable, delaying the entire project.
I finished processing the final documents in the office and was about to leave when I heard a familiar crying voice outside:
"I tried so hard, but I never expected Rachel to suddenly take my spot. A whole month of effort wasted, waaaah..."
It was Lilith...
I gripped the doorknob tightly—
Lucian's first love.
The woman who had prevented us from reconciling for thirty years.
Opening the door, I saw the familiar face.
Lucian stood imposingly, with an unprecedented intimidating aura:
"Rachel, give back the position."
Looking at Lucian's expression and the sobbing, breathless Lilith behind him, I shook my head:
"Impossible."
Chapter 2
"Rachel..."
Lucian's face showed an unprecedented look of disbelief:
"I've already been forced to agree to marry you. You think I don't know you've already arranged the wedding venue?
"You're not really going to leave. You're just doing this to make things difficult for me!"
"No, you're the one making things difficult!" I shouted.
Lilith also stepped forward with teary eyes:
"Rachel, I worked really hard for this position. Once I leave, I won't disturb you two anymore, and you can be at peace..."
"Whether you truly worked hard or not, you know it yourself. You'll never qualify for this project."
Lilith faltered, her eyes reddening further.
Before applying for this project, she had originally wanted Lucian to accompany her, which would have kept him away from me.
But because I had repeatedly harmed myself, Lucian, remembering my parents' kindness to the Aiken family, reluctantly agreed to marry me.
Lilith had angrily decided to go alone.
However, these past few months had been more about her sulking than preparing properly.
In my previous life, she hadn't succeeded in her application either.
Lucian frowned:
"How can you say she won't qualify when you haven't given her a chance?"
I waved the documents:
"Because Professor Ashton has already signed and sealed my application."
"Rachel..."
Lucian clenched his fists, unprecedented disappointment in his eyes:
"I thought you were just being difficult, but I never imagined you could be so malicious.
"You don't even need this opportunity, while Lilith has sacrificed so much to get where she is!
"I can't believe you'd take Professor Ashton's spot just to spite her!"
His breathing became increasingly unsteady as he spoke, looking at me coldly:
"Listen, even though you've manipulated me into agreeing to marry you by exploiting my debt of gratitude, after this stunt, I will never treat you as a wife for as long as I live."
"I know."
I nodded calmly.
I had already experienced that in my previous life.
Lucian turned to leave, putting his arm around Lilith's shoulders and comforting her gently:
"It's okay. I'll help you find other opportunities. Don't be sad."
That tenderness was something I had dreamed of countless times in my previous life.
But I couldn't have it then, and I wouldn't have it now.
I really should leave, Lucian.
I thought Lucian wouldn't see me again before the wedding.
But when I returned to our pre-arranged marital home, I opened the door to find him staring right at me.
Before I could speak, he walked past me and left.
I was still recovering physically.
On the dining table was a bowl of cream of mushroom soup, at just the right temperature.
My heart filled with mixed emotions.
I vaguely remembered my previous life, when he would take care of me even while despising me.
Only because my parents had asked him to look after me before they died.
So even when we fought bitterly, he would donate 600cc of blood without hesitation when I was hospitalized.
Even if we had just sworn never to speak to each other again, he would instinctively push me out of the way of an oncoming car.
He was merely repaying a debt with his life.
Yet I always demanded his heart as well.
As I drank what might be the last cream of mushroom soup I'd ever taste from him, something suddenly occurred to me.
I quickly checked the date, my heart clenching. I hurriedly put down the bowl and called my assistant while putting on my shoes:
"Go to Thirteenth Street, alley number six, immediately!"
It was still pouring outside, but I rushed out without even grabbing an umbrella.
Following my memory, I arrived at the alley where Lilith had been assaulted in my previous life.
Sure enough, there were over a dozen tall men surrounding a girl:
"Don't think you don't have to pay back the money just because your parents are dead. I've already given you until today. No money? Then pay with your body!"
"Stop!" I shouted, smashing a beer bottle against the leader's head, then grabbing Lilith's hand and running.
"Ah!" she cried out.
The rain made the ground slippery, and Lilith fell hard.
I tried several times to pull her up but couldn't, and those men were already catching up.
With no other choice, I shielded her behind me:
"Run! I'll hold them off!"
"I-I..." Lilith seemed terrified, trembling uncontrollably.
"Run now!" I shouted, struggling against the attackers. Even with ten years of Taekwondo training, I couldn't hold off a dozen men:
"I can't last much longer! Go find the police!"
"I'm... I'm so scared... I can't move..."
Lilith's voice was shaking uncontrollably.
Gritting my teeth, I kicked one man away to buy myself some time, then turned back to try to pull her up. Suddenly, she let out a piercing scream and pushed me hard.
Chapter 3
The blade pierced through my body, making me gasp.
"Blood... there's blood?"
The leader hadn't expected me to lunge forward.
He clearly hadn't intended to kill anyone, and his hand holding the knife trembled.
I stared at Lilith with wide eyes.
She cowered, shaking and looking at me: "I-I'm sorry... I was just so scared..."
Gritting my teeth, I yanked out the knife and swung it toward the men.
Since they hadn't planned on committing murder and now faced a seemingly crazed woman, all dozen or so men scattered in fear.
I staggered a few steps, nearly losing my balance.
The rain blurred my vision, but I could vaguely hear footsteps rapidly approaching.
I instinctively reached out for support, but a powerful force pushed me, slamming my back against the wall.
Lucian held the trembling Lilith in his arms, glaring at me through clenched teeth:
"I already agreed to marry you! Why must you hound her to the bitter end?!"
The wound tore with excruciating pain as I clutched my chest, struggling to swallow back blood:
"Lucian, I didn't—"
"Shut up!"
Lucian lifted Lilith into his arms. "I'll never believe another word you say."
"Lucian... I... I..." Lilith trembled in his embrace.
He immediately looked down at her, his eyes filled with concern:
"Don't be afraid. I'm taking you to the hospital right now."
"Lucian..."
I tried to speak again but collapsed heavily onto the ground.
Blood pooled around me in large puddles. Through my haze, I only saw Lucian's retreating back.
He carried Lilith to the car without a single glance back at me.
The icy rain made my entire body shiver as my outstretched hand fell heavily into the pool of blood.
Before losing consciousness, I thought I glimpsed my assistant's car and flashing police lights.
When I opened my eyes again, I was lying in a hospital bed.
Through the glass, I caught a fleeting glimpse of Lucian's face.
I closed my eyes briefly—
He had promised my parents he would at least check if I was dead or alive.
All the attackers had been arrested.
The police told me that if I hadn't shown up when I did, Lilith would have been dragged to the red-light district to work.
I knew that all too well.
In my previous life, Lilith hadn't been rescued.
By the time Lucian and his men had stormed in, she was already beaten to within an inch of her life.
After that trauma, witnessing Lucian's and my wedding had driven her to suicide in despair.
For thirty years of our marriage, Lucian had repeatedly suspected I was behind that rainy night incident.
When angry enough, I would claim responsibility for this crime I didn't commit, driving our relationship further into the abyss.
But now...
My debt was paid.
In my previous life, he had protected me with his life; in this one, I protected his beloved with mine.
When I woke up again, I found Lucian holding my IV bag.
When I was little and received my first IV, I had complained that the fluid felt cold.
Since then, whenever I needed an IV, he would warm the bag with his hands.
Our eyes met, but he quickly looked away:
"I'm planning to move the wedding venue to Turkey..."
His voice was low.
I paused in surprise:
"You already knew?"
"Yes, Rachel told me everything."
My phone vibrated with a message from my assistant:
[Miss Kingsley, Ms. Morgan has agreed to be the bride]
I sighed:
"As long as you're happy..."
He looked at me, confusion briefly flashing in his eyes before quickly returning to his usual cold demeanor:
"I've wronged you."
"You don't need to apologize. This was my choice."
My phone rang, interrupting Lucian's words.
I saw the caller ID—
[Lilith]
"Okay, I'm coming right over. Don't worry."
He quickly hung up and tucked my blanket in: "See you at the wedding."
I nodded:
"Don't worry, even if I'm not there in person, my gift will be."
He paused at the doorway and frowned:
"Don't joke about that."
I smiled without responding.
He hesitated momentarily before quickly turning to leave.
My advisor messaged me:
[Flight tonight. Are you feeling well enough? Do you want me to reschedule it?]
I replied:
[No need, Professor. I'm coming to meet you now]
The wedding day arrived quickly.
Lucian stood holding roses, quietly waiting for Rachel to emerge from the dressing room.
He had never liked the idea of this wedding.
Yet in this moment, he found himself feeling a hint of anticipation.
Somehow, he had become less resistant to this marriage.
Perhaps it was because after Lilith was rescued, she had clarified during her statement that Rachel had no connection to the debt collectors.
Thinking of how he had pushed her down into the rain, so focused on Lilith that he hadn't even noticed Rachel's serious injury, kept him awake night after night.
Watching her lie unconscious, he had feared several times that Rachel might never open her eyes again.
It was then that he vowed to take extra care of her for the rest of his life.
